‘Lads, lads.....look!....’

Setting: The Hut, Düsseldorf.

Christmas Eve morning in the Hut and Barry comes charging in carrying shopping bags.

Barry - "Lads, lads, look what I've got! I've been down the old town, look what I've bought!"

Oz - "Go on, dazzle wor...."

Barry - "I've had this brill idea, roight. I'm gonna make us all a Yule log!"

Moxey - "A what?"

Barry - "A Yule log."

Oz - "Ah, divvent bother with all that Barry man, if it's a Yule log you're after, I've just left one of them in the bog!" He he!

Barry - "Very funny Oz, very funny.(rolls eyes) "A Yule log, Moxey is a traditional Christmas cake in the shape of a log, covered in chocolate and

decorated with holly and such like. It's very festive!"

Bomber - "Chocolate! That's not a man's cake!"

Neville - "Well I always thought a fruit cake was traditional at Christmas. Brenda always makes a fruit cake, like."

Barry - "Oh no, Neville, under no circumstances can I make a fruit cake! It's the nuts, you see. A fruit cake has to have nuts in it and I for one

cannot go anywhere near a nut. I've got anaphylactic shock syndrome, I have!"

Moxey - "Anna who?"

Barry -(tuts and rolls eyes) "What do you mean, Anna who! Anaphylactic shock syndrome! It's a bloody allergy,innit, nerk!" If any kind of nut comes

near me,I blow up like a puffer fish! Me throat swells up and everything! A packet of peanuts could kill me!!"no no, a Yule log it is, take it or leave it.

Wayne - "Well I'll leave it then, son. Bad for the image, eating cake. Now if it's crumpet your talking about, well that's a whole new ball game, innit,

he he!"

Barry - "Trust you , Wayne to sully the festive season with cheap sexual innuendo, it's pathetic!"

Den - "Look Barry, man if I were you I'd forget all about your bloody Yule log. It may have escaped your notice but the hut's not got a cooker, has it.

So I don't know how your gonna bake your bloody cake!"

Barry - "Oh, bloody hell! I never thought of that, did I! What the piggin hell am I supposed to do with this turkey!!!" (Pulls a massive Turkey out of a

carrier bag) the lads all burst out laughing.

Neville - "Well Barry, I'd say you were S T U double F E D !!!"