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'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

General chat about all things Auf Wiedersehen, Pet.

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Tracy
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Tracy » Fri Feb 06, 2015 9:38 pm

The builders next door watched as 3 coppers went tearing past, sirens screaming and lights flashing. We are on the main road so coppers, ambulances, fire engines are an every day experience. I was hanging oot the washing when I heard one of them say, "Must get that every day on this side of town." No prizes for guessing the Douglas line I wanted to shout back but bottled it ! :roll:
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by terryleather » Sat Feb 07, 2015 6:47 am

"We live here and you...DOONT"?
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Tracy
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Tracy » Sat Feb 07, 2015 8:16 am

terryleather wrote:"We live here and you...DOONT"?
Aye mate ! [ Here is a prize for yee anyways; :P> ]
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Tracy » Mon Feb 23, 2015 9:43 pm

I did 3 hours and fifteen minutes straight, washing the windows at McDonalds this morning. The security cameras in each corner were a temptation. I wanted to say, "Sod you Startup, ya scurvy tosser !" Then look up at the camera and say, "Oh shyte !" Ive only been there a few weeks so bottled it :oops:
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Hallwood » Fri May 01, 2015 11:03 pm

I was walking home from work, and in the traffic, there was a lorry with "DENNIS" on the grille, then another lorry behind it with "MAN". Unfortunately, the car behind them didn't have a sign in the window saying "I'm not a carpenter!".

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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by GeordieMaffia » Sat May 02, 2015 8:44 am

Everytime someone at work says 'Theres a letter for you' or 'Phone for you' I am always dying to say 'Impossible, man. Naebody knows I'm here. '

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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Hedley Irwin » Sat May 02, 2015 11:07 am

Hallwood wrote:I was walking home from work, and in the traffic, there was a lorry with "DENNIS" on the grille, then another lorry behind it with "MAN". Unfortunately, the car behind them didn't have a sign in the window saying "I'm not a carpenter!".
:lol: :lol:
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Hallwood » Sun May 03, 2015 5:23 pm

I was at a friend's house last night and he was showing me his new herb garden. I did want to use the "herb garden" line, but I don't think he's as familiar with AWP as I am, so I didn't bother.

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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Tracy » Sun May 03, 2015 10:46 pm

Hallwood wrote:There's someone asleep in the locker room at my work. I had to resist the temptation to inform him that this isn't a doss house, chuck.
Same thing happened to me, workin at McDonalds this morning. A woman was sittin at the table, head on her arm just like Moxey, sound asleep. How I dreamed of using that one ! :P
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by GatesheadRevisited » Mon May 04, 2015 8:44 am

Went to Dubai but decided not to say Jammy Arab........:)

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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Lou » Tue Jun 02, 2015 5:34 pm

Had to go round to my apartment that I rent out today, as my tenant said there were a couple of repairs that needed doing. He said "The lounge dimmer switch doesn't work, it just turns on and off."
The temptation to say, "Well, I think dimmers are unreliable and dangerous" was almost too much to bear.......
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Hallwood » Fri May 06, 2016 4:51 pm

There's a couple of lads outside my flat kicking a football around. I'm tempted to go all-out Arthur on them and ask if they can go to a field instead to play football. But they're both foreign, so they probably won't get it.

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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Auf Wiedersehen, Pet » Fri May 06, 2016 7:32 pm

Just shout:

"Ranning, Ranning, Ranning, puh, puh, puh!.." And flap your arms around like an hysterical owl...
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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by Musta bin Elbowed » Mon Aug 01, 2016 1:20 pm

Woman wearing sunglasses on the tube yesterday, bumped into me as she got off, and said sorry. Oh how I wanted to reply, "If you took those stupid glasses off, hedgehog..."

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Re: 'NOT' talking Pet in real life.

Post by RHill » Mon Aug 01, 2016 10:36 pm

We've had new neighbours moved in next door to me about 6-weeks ago. An old couple around 70. The man is always gardening. He's always passing me some of his Marigold flowers over the fence that he grows at his allotment. I secretly don't think much of Marigolds but I always take them and be grateful - as you do. He can talk for hours about his chickens and his granddaughters. Lovely bloke, but goes on a bit. Anyway, I was opening my bedroom window this morning and saw the old man talking to my girlfriend over the fence about his chickens. I was extremely close of shouting: "You baldy old git!"

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