© Auf Wiedersehen, Pet is copyright of ITV Studios, BBC & Franc Roddam.

‘I lived in a place like this once.....’

Story Name - A Stormy Fan Event Part 2 Author - Lee Barratt, original idea by Grant Brereton. Premise - A fan fiction not based on the lads, but based around the Fansite team and well known fans. Locations include those seen in Series 2 of Auf Wiedersehen, Pet such as Thornely Manor and The Barley Mow.


Lee, Tim and Andy have broken down whilst travelling around Nottinghamshire making sure everything is set up and ready for tomorrows

Fan Event. Fans are travelling down, and fan Grant has checked into a local B&B, not a thousand miles from The Barley Mow.

Grant gets to his room at the B&B. He puts his bag and guitar on the bed. Then looks around as if he’s a bit bored. He decides to phone

the Mrs...

Grant: “Hi babe, you alright?” Mrs: “Yeah, me and Sian just getting ready to go for pre-wedding drinks!” Grant: “Ah right, cool, sorry if it’s a bit weird without me there.” Mrs: “It’s ok. I just miss you. It IS a bit weird!” Grant: “Sorry babe, just so bloody unfortunate with the dates clashing!” Mrs: “So, did you fin the B&B ok?” Grant: “Yeah, bloody weather’s atrocious though. What’s it like in Cardiff?” Mrs: “It’s dry down here. Are you ok, sound a bit pissed off?” Grant: “Oh I don’t know babe, just wonder what I’m doing here.” Mrs: “WHAT? Why ARE you there then?” Grant: “Can’t explain it, can I. It’s just something I have to do. I didn’t miss the convention and I wasn’t going to miss this. Might not happen again!” Mrs: “Well hopefully Stan Hey will show up and it will be worth it...” Grant: “Exactly, and remember, I’m a few years older than you babe, but to us lot of a certain age, ‘Pet’ takes us back to a magical place in time, when everything was simpler.” Mrs: “Ok, I get it. So I’ll see you Sunday night. Don’t drink too much tomorrow!” Grant: “I won’t. And love to Sian and Tony. Hope they get some nice weather tomorrow. Wish I was there babe!” Mrs: “Have you met any of the other fans yet, or those who run the website?..” Grant: “No not yet, I’ve just got myself sorted” Mrs: “I suppose you’ll be heading out to the pub then?” Grant: “Well I didn’t come up here to build a ship yer kna...” Mrs: “Huh?...” Grant: “Oh I certainly will” Mrs: “Love you later.” Grant: “Love you, bye.”

Grant takes out his guitar and goes to play it, but it’s horrendously out of tune. He puts it back down, looks at the flowery wallpaper,

switches on the tv, sees there’s nothing but shite on, switches off the tv, then lets out an enormous sigh and crashes back on the bed with

his arms behind his head.

Back to Lee, Tim and Andy - still walking in the pouring rain…

Lee: “I thought Boy Racers were supposed to know about engines!” Andy: “Never mind the Bavarian Alps, I never thought I’d be pushing a Corsa round Derbyshire!” Tim: “Derbyshire? That’s in the middle of bloody ney…” Lee: “Yes, very good Tim!” Tim: “Well we’re not pushing it are we, we left it miles back. And we’ve still got to figure out how to get it going before the fans start arriving tomorrow.” Lee: “Ah, this is the perfect start to our weekend.” Andy: “What was that?” Lee: “What was what?” Andy: “That animal that just shot past!” Lee: “Probably just a Fox or a Badger.” Tim: “A nude Badger?” Lee: “This is gonna be a long friggin’ night!” The lads finally reach the road leading up to Thornely Manor. Andy: “We are walking up there then? Lee: “We bloody are aye! Tim: “Listen lads, there is something I need to tell you like...” Lee: “Well I must admit Tim, I’m amazed you managed to get Thornely Manor on board.” Andy: “Yeah, with all that trouble of fans turning up unannounced, I thought that was a no-go area!” Tim: “Er, there might be a problem there lads.” Andy: “Why, what problem?” Tim: “I might have embellished a bit when I said they were OK with us visiting.” Lee: “You what?” Tim: “I figured I could talk them round in person tomorrow.” Andy: “Well tomorrow is now.....this just gets better and better!” Tim: “Right, come on then...” The lads start the long walk down the road to Thornely Manor, not yet knowing that the whole place is deserted. As they near the property, they can see that no lights are on, and no cars are parked on the drive circling the manor. Tim: “I lived in a pl.....” Andy: “Tim, enough....” Tim: “Alright...” Lee: “It doesn’t look like anyone is here, the place looks deserted” They walk up to the front door. Darkness is really falling now and it will be totally dark soon. Andy: “Right Tim, seeing as you’ve bollocksed this up, you can knock or ring the bell or whatever it is” Tim pulls the large handle and the lads can hear the bell ringing, but after a few minutes no one has come to the door and there is a total silence. Tim: “Maybe they’re round the back? Andy: “What having a barbecue like?....Come on.” The only option they have is to walk around the back to see if anyone is there. Andy: “And if any of you mention watering the geraniums, someone is going to get hurt...” The 3 of them walk round to the back of the manor. Lee: “It’s totally deserted, now what?” Tim: “We could break in...” Andy: “Have you totally lost your mind like, that’s breaking and entering, we are not doing that..” Lee: “How far is The Barley Mow from here? Tim: “If we walk across the fields, I’d say about 3 miles....” Lee: “We are going to have to do that aren’t we. The family has probably gone out or left, it looks like the power is out...” Andy: “You don’t say...” Lee: “Well I reckon we should get a move on, cause it’s nearly dark now and I don’t fancy being out in the pitch black all night” Tim: “Scared of ghosts?” Lee: “No, not at all, not at all...” Andy: “Come on lets get going. I never thought I’d not want to be at Thornely Manor...” As the lads head around front, they see the headlights just coming through the gates of the manor. Andy: “Bloody hell its the law, get down man...” Andy pushes the lads to the ground, and they hide behind the wall, just by the scene where Oz talks about ‘Footballers getting to a certain age’ Whispering Tim: “What d’ya do that for? Andy: “What did I do that for?!. Its pitch black, and us three are wearing black T-Shirts and pants and we are here in the middle of nowhere scoping up Thornely Manor, they’ll have us banged up before you can say ‘Dagmars hairy armpits’...” Lee: “Errr....” The lads watch as the Police drive slowly around the circled gravel drive at the front of the Manor, and then drive slowly out and back down the long road, back to the village. Andy: “That was a bit close...” Tim: “Just checking it was alright I reckon...” Lee: “Right come on then.....” The lads head in the opposite direction, straight across the field towards The Barley Mow. To be continued.....