Martin McKeand: 'A Haze of Beer and Schnapps Fumes...’ Part One.
Series producer of Auf Wiedersehen, Pet Martin McKeand has written a piece for the Fansite to celebrate 35 extraordinary
years of Britain’s #1 ITV Comedy Drama! From those first memories in Hamburg, Dusseldorf and Elstree to those final scenes
shot on the back of a Yacht in Marbella. with his good friend and AWP director Roger Bamford. We were so excited about Martin
getting involved that this is the first of several pieces that he’s kindly agreed to write for the Official Fansite!
Copyright: The following images, articles and text are copyright awpet.com.
Site Release Date: 11th November 2018
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Auf Wiedersehen, Pet 1983 - 2018
First, it's extraordinary to think it is 35 years since all that
happened! Of course though some memories are crystal clear some
are lost in a haze of beer and schnapps fumes. And as someone
once said of the sixties, "If you can remember them you weren't
there".
The first image that always comes to my mind is from those early
days of location shooting in Hamburg, in a rather luxurious hotel
bar, Jimmy Nail musing aloud: "Amazing really, me, a humble
welder, plucked from obscurity and surrounded by glamorous
boilers." This line not written by Clement or La Frenais, but from the
man who later created and wrote "Spender". And there was the
occasion when for some reason the armed Hamburg police decided to raid the hotel where most of the cast and crew were
staying, looking for some miscreant who was wisely hiding out in a cupboard in Ray Winstone's room. Ray had a part in
only one episode ("The Fugitive") but because of the way shooting is scheduled, he became an almost permanent cast
member. Ray of course has gone on to become one of the UK's leading actors, specialising in "hard man" roles, but in real
life he was a friendly and jovial member of the gang.
Then there was the occasion when somebody brought two ladies
of the night back to the hotel with him. To the night porter's
protests he replied: "I don't see what your problem is, pal, it's me
who's got to f**k 'em, not you". After which I was called into the
hotel manager's office. "In our country people who make films
are artists, civilised people. This does not seem to be true of some
of your group. I must ask you all to leave." Fortunately after
much discussion we were allowed to stay.
This of course was after the very first day of shooting which
occurred on the Harwich - Hook of Holland ferry, where we see
Neville penning the first of his "Dear Brenda" postcards. Neville
(Kevin Whately) almost hadn't made the boat - he had called the production office two days before asking "Do I need a
passport to go to Europe ?" Somebody worked wonders and he was able to travel.
After ten days filming in Hamburg we returned to Blighty for
studio shooting in Elstree where the "German Building Site" was
under construction. What used to happen was that we would
rehearse scenes for a few days then go into the studio or onto the
"German Building Site" to shoot them. On the first day of
rehearsal everybody was there except Jimmy. Urgent calls were
made, nobody had seen him. Somebody had the idea of phoning
the nicks and police stations in the Newcastle area. "No, we
haven't seen him for some time, it's been very quiet". I couldn't
help wondering if Jimmy had had enough of acting and being
surrounded by glamorous boilers, and gone back to a life of
enjoyable obscurity on Tyneside. How little I knew the man. An
hour later he wandered insouciantly into the rehearsal room, a train had been delayed. He was never late again.
And talking of this process, rehearsing then shooting, it might happen that we might rehearse a scene some time before it
was shot. And here I pay tribute to my friend and colleague, director Roger Bamford, who had the most phenomenal
memory. When shooting a scene on a boat in Marbella, Spain, he said to an actor "But in the rehearsal (three months ago
in England) you moved from here to here, and paused a second before you said the line." A great director, all actors loved
him. Without him it would have been a different and probably less interesting show.
And talking of the strange way in which filming is scheduled, there is a scene where Barry goes through a door, and emerges
on the other side two stone heavier. Maybe 'The Fansite Team' will offer a prize to whoever spots it. But I see we are only
into the first month of production, and if I go on at this rate I might as well write a book. But who would read it ?
When I met people for the first time and they asked what I have
done they would say "That's a terrific show, I love it". Then later: "My
Mam and Dad really loved that show" and more recently "My
Grandma really used to love it". But in the words of Samuel Beckett
( now he could have written some great AWP scripts ) "Try again but
better ".
When the first series was finished, the people who ran Central
Television decided they didn't like it. We had been promised a cover
and major promotion in the TV Times. Instead we got a short
column inside the paper, but still 6 million people watched it. Then
after six weeks the series was taken off and turgid drama with a
very strongly feminist story line was put on in its place - for what purpose I know not. Anyway as it turned out we had been
done a favour, when we were put on again word was out and our viewing figures were now 15 million plus. Unthinkable in
these days. Meanwhile the same f**kwits at Central Television were too nervous to commit to another series.
This gives rise to another story which actually became part of a lawsuit bought by Jimmy Nail against the News of the
World. Throughout the first series Jimmy had worn a leather jacket provided by the wardrobe department. At the end of
production, and because Central hadn't committed to a second series,the wardrobe department had a sale. Jimmy bought
the jacket. This for some reason got turned into some vile "Jimmy Nail Greed" piece in the 'News of the World' along with
various other stories, and Jimmy took them to court and won. It was Central's nervousness which led to the long delay
between series one and two. By the time they were ready, the actors had mostly got involved in other projects and it took
nearly two years to get everything together again. Plus, we had burned down "the hut", and it was no longer appropriate to
set the show in Germany.
So Clement, La Frenais, Roger Bamford, Stan Hey and I set off for the "Costa del Crime" to see what there was to see down
there. See Stan's piece here written a little time back for a description of that trip. My main memory is that it rained pretty
well all the time we were down there, not a promising start to series two......
The Auf Wiedersehen, Pet team would personally like to thank Martin for taking the time to write for the
Official Fansite.